There was a firetruck named Jerry. He was brand new, fresh out of the factory, and was sitting in the sunlight in front of the fire station. He wasn't sure why he was self-aware and he was scared of this new awareness. He tried to calm himself, reminding himself of his purpose, he was here to serve and protect humans from fire. He glanced across the street and saw a little boy playing with a sprinkler. He was having so much fun. Jerry was enthralled, he couldn't take his eyes off the boy as he jumped around in the water, dancing and enjoying the water. Jerry forgot that he was a firetruck and raced over to the boy, taking a telephone pole and a small scooter with him in the process. Jerry was so happy driving back and forth through the water as it splashed against his windshield and mirrors. He was lost in pure joy and didn't immediately hear the screaming. He looked around and saw a woman pointing at him, tears running down her face and screaming in terror. He glanced down and saw the driveway was slowly being covered in red, the water mixing with red turning it slowly pink. He backed up, crushing a police cruiser with two officers inside who had responded to the distressed woman calling. Jerry panicked, not sure what to do, he tried to drive away. He had to get away from the horror. And then he felt pain, his whole chassis shook, as he saw a man walk into view holding a shotgun. He blasted at Jerry again, this time hitting the firetruck's fuel line. Jerry felt the world around him slowly go dark. Again he tried in vain to get away. Another blast. His taillights shattering and falling to the ground. And then, flames coursed around Jerry. Pain coursed through him and below his wheels started to melt and then popped. Jerrys' siren went off and he let out a long honk. Within a minute, it stopped and his engine slowed and finally came to a halt. Jerry, the first sentient firetruck, was dead.
Don't judge :)
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
The one?
Is there really such a thing as the one? I don't know, but the question keeps plaguing me.
I met a guy a few weeks ago, he lives 1,500 miles away and so very close to my family. We talk everyday, not just the short "hey how you doing today?" but the crazy "I can't stop thinking about you!" sort of way. And it makes me question so many things.
I've come to the realization that my heart isn't nearly as stone as I thought it was. Back when the whole thing happened with my ex-husband, the craziness the need to speak to him to be with him was intense to say the least. And I sit here and I have to question to if this is the same sort of thing. The main differences are really just the time in which it's happened, and how crazily connected we are to each other. My ex and I had very little in common in our day-to-day lives. There were certainly things we agreed on, but equally as much we didn't agree on. And it took me almost a year (spread out over 2 years) for me to get to the point where I was willing to move 1,500 miles from home and my family to be with him. And even that was after we'd met in person, and all the baggage had come out.
And with Corey, I've shared every bit of baggage I've got with him, considering selling my house and leaving all my friends, just to be with him and it's been less than a month! And my voice of reason is SCREAMING in my ear.
So, is it the same as before? Similar, but no it's not the same. I am being impulsive, reckless, and so incredibly stupid. And I don't care, because I'm a bullet on it's way to the target. I'm flying through the air and if I miss the target and smash into the wall, well it was a helluva rush! But if I hit that target, square in his heart...(I know, so violent!)
I love him. I sit here with a shit-faced grin and I want to stab myself in the eye to stop it. But I can't. If we're fated to go out in a blaze of glory and it's short-lived, then it'll be a GREAT show. But, it's seeming more and more that he's got the key I was looking for. He's already unlocked everything inside, the good and the bad. And he's still here, he didn't run away and he loves me, not in spite of those things, but because of them.
So, Corey, I love you and I sit here on the edge with you, waiting to take the plunge into the unknown.
I met a guy a few weeks ago, he lives 1,500 miles away and so very close to my family. We talk everyday, not just the short "hey how you doing today?" but the crazy "I can't stop thinking about you!" sort of way. And it makes me question so many things.
I've come to the realization that my heart isn't nearly as stone as I thought it was. Back when the whole thing happened with my ex-husband, the craziness the need to speak to him to be with him was intense to say the least. And I sit here and I have to question to if this is the same sort of thing. The main differences are really just the time in which it's happened, and how crazily connected we are to each other. My ex and I had very little in common in our day-to-day lives. There were certainly things we agreed on, but equally as much we didn't agree on. And it took me almost a year (spread out over 2 years) for me to get to the point where I was willing to move 1,500 miles from home and my family to be with him. And even that was after we'd met in person, and all the baggage had come out.
And with Corey, I've shared every bit of baggage I've got with him, considering selling my house and leaving all my friends, just to be with him and it's been less than a month! And my voice of reason is SCREAMING in my ear.
So, is it the same as before? Similar, but no it's not the same. I am being impulsive, reckless, and so incredibly stupid. And I don't care, because I'm a bullet on it's way to the target. I'm flying through the air and if I miss the target and smash into the wall, well it was a helluva rush! But if I hit that target, square in his heart...(I know, so violent!)
I love him. I sit here with a shit-faced grin and I want to stab myself in the eye to stop it. But I can't. If we're fated to go out in a blaze of glory and it's short-lived, then it'll be a GREAT show. But, it's seeming more and more that he's got the key I was looking for. He's already unlocked everything inside, the good and the bad. And he's still here, he didn't run away and he loves me, not in spite of those things, but because of them.
So, Corey, I love you and I sit here on the edge with you, waiting to take the plunge into the unknown.
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